On the Irish word "aerach" - gay, in meaning both "queer sexuality" and "joyousness", "lightheartedness", and their connection, freedom and positive spiritual indifference & personal insights & experiences, published on the 04/02/2026

Some while ago, an Irish-speaking friend and I discussed the Irish word aerach. In modern Irish, in part due to the modern semantics of the word gay in English, aerach has come to be used as a term to mean gay or queer in Irish. I am not in any sense denying the use of this word in this context, and I think that in all probability the word's older semantic meanings could also encompass the semantics of gay and queer in English. But I would also like to explore the wider meanings of this word. 

In essence, the Irish word aerach in historic contexts, was used much in the same way that the English word gay was used in many historic contexts. The word aerach is semantically connected to the Irish word aer which means "air", and so aerach can be translated to mean "airy", but in the sense of being lighthearted, joyous and free. The word gay in English was also frequently used in this way in the past, and whilst I like the modern usage of these terms, I think it is also a shame that these words are not used more widely still in the context of meaning "airy", "lighthearted", "without worry" and "joyous". 

I have experienced feelings of both semantic meanings of aerach and gay - at least when these words also are used to encompass bisexuality or more fluid sexuality of some kind, and not just strictly homosexuality. I have also experienced aerach in a way that aligns with its usage as meaning "lighthearted, joyous", and I would like to extend this subject towards what can only be one of the most beautiful expressions of human experience - that which is positive spiritual indifference. But what do I mean by "positive spiritual indifference?"

Too often, society today encourages indifference about certain things, for example empathy. Modern society often takes a route of giving people the impression that they need to be concerned about a lot of things but that it is normal to be indifferent to other things. But indifference can be negative. When people are indifferent to empathy, or indifferent to spiritual traditions, this only distances the human mind and soul from freedom and actualisation. At the same time - being overly concerned about the lives of celebrities, or being overly concerned in general about others' business in a negative way, is also a negative thing. It wastes our time, it wastes their time, and ultimately makes little to no positive difference. For example, you meet someone who has different political views from you. Unless these are negative/harm causing and harmful views in and of themselves, there is nothing to be gained from being concerned about the beliefs or lifestyle of another. Even if someone is for example a labour voter but judges someone for voting conservative - I would say, neither of these belief systems is inherently evil, and both are flawed - so sometimes it is better to judge someone not on the words and categories they use to define themselves - but rather to judge them based upon their actions and whether or not these actions are harmful to other life.

I actually recently distanced myself from a friend, because they were far too concerned with my life in a negative way, with the fact that I believed in ancient magic and such, and did things differently from them, yet I did not feel they were concerned enough about my emotional wellbeing. Distancing myself from this person was not about falling out with them or about being "right" or "wrong", it was just recognising the difference between positive criticism and what quite frankly felt like emotional control, and, when one recognises the latter, it is good to distance oneself from people, because these things are part of what stops us from feeling aerach. There is also a difference between being aerach and being "YOLO" - they are completely different from each other, and sadly a lot of people confuse the "YOLO" ideology with being lighthearted and truly joyous. Of course, a core thing about the "YOLO" ideology is that it means "you only live once", and of course the spiritually minded among us will recognise that, even if we do only live once in this human world before going to another, our presence here and our actions in life are important and meaningful. The "YOLO" ideology is synonymous with negative indifference, because it denies the aforementioned points about life and our choices of actions being important and meaningful.

This is why I get frustrated when I hear American friends online literally demonise anyone who is of a certain religion or background. We all have different cultures and backgrounds, and there is far too much judgement in the world based upon this - and not upon actions and how people actually treat others. A person can be a powerful climate change activist and yet be a very nasty individual deep down. Similarly, a person brought up in a traditional Christian society might prove to be just and understanding and empathic as someone who considers themselves "liberal". I have met many people who class themselves as being more "conservative" who are very homophobic, yes. But I've also met people who class themselves as "liberal" and yet who treat other liberals and gay people as mere objects and tools in their game of power. Empathy and critical thinking go a long way here when it comes to seeing who is truly who, and the longer that humans keep falling out because of our names and identities - the less we are able to make an actual positive difference by identifying how the actions and views of different people actually affect others. And we are not just talking about "others" in terms of people, does a person also have kindness and empathy for animals and the planet? Etc. In a spiritual sense, it is not at all sufficient to be "nice" to people yet to be indifferent to animals and to nature for instance. I mean, animals and nature are our world, so to be indifferent to them is to be indifferent to the meaning of life itself. 

Photo below: a view from the beautiful Grianán Ailigh showing the impressive walled structure and the breathtaking view beyond, with gentle fields, mountains and spring morning cloud formations. The photo below does I hope help to show the place where I experienced such intense and pure feelings of love, and to show how this site, sacred since ancient times, occupied such a beautiful position in this sacred landscape.  

But what then does it mean to be "positively indifferent" or to be "positively spiritually indifferent?" And does this also connect to romantic love and to sexuality in some way, but in a way which is less about identity, and more about one's state of being? I think it does. 

A few years ago I was in Ireland, and, it was beautiful, but I felt kind of sad internally, romantically rejected and in essence - lonely, on a romantic level. I wandered around Donegal with my dad, spoke some Irish, went to some beautiful places, saw some amazing scenery and history. As we returned from Donegal towards County Derry, Condaidh Dhoire, we passed on the right a hillside that slopes downwards towards a flat area, on the other side of which begins the Innishowen, Inis Eoghain peninsula. On the hilltop that overlooks the start of the peninsula, is an ancient sacred site, known as Grianán Ailigh, a large, impressive circular drystone wall structure around an enclosure. This site is connected to the sun goddess Grianán and to the Tuatha Dé Danann in Irish spiritual and their mythological history. 

I remember, my mind had been in a kind of mist until this point on the trip, due to this inner romantic loneliness I felt. Upon this hill, it seemed to change, unnoticeably at first, but I started to take in the view, I did not realise just how much of a view this place had. Some lightness and sense of what I can only describe as the Holy Spirit, Peace, the presence of the Tuatha Dé Danann, seemed suddenly to blow away the cloudiness in my mind, and to allow me to look upon the earth as though anew. This blonde haired lady who looked a bit like one of the Tuatha Dé Danann, said "hi" to me in a way that seemed gentle and slightly flirtatious, and which made me feel noticed. She had studied the landscape there in university for 4 years, and was interested in spirituality also. This was lovely, not only did this "washing away of the mist" allow me to see clearly, but apparently it also made me in some way spiritually visible to others - although I have experienced this in Ireland before. 

I wandered around Grianán Ailigh and saw how the view all around was perfect and wondrous. It isn't the highest hill in Ireland, nor the most dramatic of landscapes, but it is easily one of the most beautiful and positive-feeling places I have ever been to. Everything felt wonderous, light, joyous. Spring was on its way, gentle sunlight spread across the mountains of Inishowen, their heather-covered, rocky slopes and the clouds blowing overhead to the ethereal music of the Tuatha Dé Danann. In other directions, countryside, glowing a gentle light green, expanded out far and wide, with hedges and trees making gentle patterns of furrows and hills extending to other mountain ranges in the distance. The sea lochs of Ulster extended southwards and inland, their waters and sands glittering and still. The world felt anew, like the new day had washed away all darkness, and just being able to see and be part of this beautiful landscape made me feel so simply alive and joyous in the most natural way. It was a sense of one with the Creator, a sense that everything was perfect, that the passage of time between the ancient mythological world and the present ceased to exist. 

It was as though there was no time, that Creation was not something that happened, but something that was now, and I recognised myself within it. This is also an example of "positive spiritual indifference", because I was certainly not indifferent to empathy and love - but I certainly was indifferent to the temporality of human experience and was far beyond the reach of the things in the world that would drag down my energy and make me doubt - because when you feel a sense of oneness and creation like this, when you feel that the eternal, the now, are the same, that the creation of life and the universe exist beyond time and space and are by no means defined by them - you are beyond doubt and illusion, you can't feel lonely, because the whole universe and all of life dances with you.

This is also what I feel the word aerach encompasses - a feeling of higher joy and liberation which takes one far beyond the divisions and illusions of body and identity in a divisive sense. In this greater liberation, body and identity take on different meanings, because the ego becomes silent, dancing with us, and our identity becomes what we love, and our body becomes the music that our heart dances to. In this positive sense, we dance to the beat of our own song, and this is not divisive, because we understand that our song, our music, is a part of the music of life and of creation itself, and we see how, nature and life, sings and dances with us. 

Now this, despite being different from aerach and gay on a left-brained semantic level, actually encompasses exactly what gayness and queerness is I think, at its core, really about - the liberation of our body and our identity from the illusions and shortsightedness of our own minds, and the recognition of our own sacred song in the fabric of creation. And for many this might mean a liberation in terms of coming out as gay, but for others, to a heterosexual person who was previously homophobic for example, being aerach might mean to be be indifferent to others being gay and to love and to instead love and accept them as they are. Because when we embrace our own song, we recognise the beauty and importance of those of others' - and judgement in this sense ceases to have meaning. 

Photo below: another view of part of the site of Grianán Ailigh, with some of the mountains of Inishowen/Inis Eoghain visible behind the three-tier wall. The circular nature of the site is reminiscent of its association with the sun, and as I mention it is also connected to the mysterious Tuatha Dé Danann who I have discussed in a lot of detail elsewhere. Donegal is connected to them.